From: Love-Letters of Margaret Fuller, 1845-1846
Author:
Published: 1903 New York
DEAREST FRIEND,
For such I cannot choose but have thee, oh it was a waste of this heavenly day to walk upon that terrace away from the gentle growing things and talk about these barriers that keep us apart. Better to forget them! better be blest in the affinities while we may!
And then you have so much more energy and spirit for the fight! I must try not to throw down the poor little silk glove again in defiance or the steel gauntlet. And you, oh set up no mental limits against me; do not, I pray.
Is it not hard on my side? You can think what thoughts or conquest you will, and I cannot disprove them to you. On the other side you must be as the stone, if I give way to feelings of love and reliance, and you have your mysterious reasons against me there. You talk to me with such cold wisdom sometimes, I do not know the brother of my soul, to whom I had but just flown.
Next time we must go to Hoboken-it is not so confined there. You must tell me things, and I will forget myself; that is always the best way. I look up the free and noble river. I feel myself associated with you in the new religion and that suits me, but to-day you put me in the dust, and a hundred miles from you, too.
This afternoon, though, a singular change took place in my feelings. I am curious to know, whether induced by you, or rising in myself, and shall ask you so soon as we meet.
There has been the most glorious thundershower. I hope you have enjoyed it. Now the moon is shining queenly. I must be with you one more moonlight evening. She seems to bless so purely. I feel all fears and piques melt as I look upon her. Yet through pain, through pain, sweet Queen, must we come to where thy pale mother’s smile calls. As says Novalis:
Till the whole heart has fallen to the earth in ashes.
Might these be the right lines? I cannot remember what they are. Come to-morrow morning without fail.
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