Letter XIV.

From: Love-Letters of Margaret Fuller, 1845-1846
Published: 1903 New York

Wednesday, 2d April.

  I must not, dear friend, try to answer your letter; it moves me too much. May good angels guide you! It was painful to see your letter curtailed of a part, yet I appreciate the cause, that takes it from me. So would I have it. Let all that is given to me be with the full consent of your mind; then shall I be at home in its permanent temper.

  Though the veil of mystery must be sad for one, who would like to come close in reliance, yet such is my belief in your honour, and shall I not say your tender regard for me, that I shall not, voluntarily, seek to penetrate it, even by a mental question. Yet certainly it will be happier for me, if you do not leave me thus in the dark, when you go for so long and so far a travel. The only part that can trouble me is to see you reproach yourself in some degree. Yet can I never look on you and believe, that conscience is seriously gekränkt and you told me, that you had “only broken through the conventions of this world.” That I know a generous and ardent nature may do, without deep injury; yet much outward difficulty may ensue. But, again, only with your full consent would I hear ever a word more. You will act as the heart prompts in communion with me, and as to the circumstances of our outward intercourse, as there are influences unknown to me, you will consult them as you have consulted them, and my trust will be in you.

  Again, may our good angels guide you and foster daily the best and loveliest self!

  P. S. I shall expect you to-morrow, but I wish it were to-day. Twenty-four hours are a great many, more than enough to bring clouds, yet they will not come on the heaven of the mind, not this time.

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